Sewing and life

 Goodness I can’t believe a week has passed since I was last on here. I just don’t seem to stop.. which is good in one way, but in another it does all catch up with me. 

I put my little red car up for sale today. I love that car and always took the dogs everywhere in it. I haven’t been able to use it though since my pupster baby G was killed. And I can’t afford to just keep it there, so it has to go. It’ll help with funds which I so dearly need too. 

I got my enhanced DBS certificate through this week, so that’s one thing sorted. And I had another job interview today for a job that sounds like I could really get my teeth into and love. But they are interviewing all next week as well so I shall just keep it all crossed. And it’s literally 4 minutes away by car so I can nip home and see the dogs! 

I’ve been trying to list things on eBay still, which tbh isn’t going that well! I’m just so busy all the time! And I’m eating rubbish which doesn’t help with moods does it? I’m still looking for somewhere else to live. 

A beautiful sunny day today, but icy when I left for work at 3.15am this morning! I’ve had daytimes free this week as the school is on half term. 

I’ve got my little Bernini out! I love that sewing machine. Never fails me and it’s a year younger than me! 1972 edition 807! 

I’m using up all the fabrics I’ve got (may take a while!) and I’m going to make just some basic lap quilts I think! I try to sew a few lines a day! Then when I think it’s big enough I shall back it and quilt it. And may be reopen my old Etsy shop! Who knows! 

This is the first quilt top -not finished yet! 

I miss the phone calls, texts, jokes, company and support from D so very much. 

I miss my puppy boy G, the cheekiness, cuddles and love. Bless them xx 

Storm Eunice

Such a windy day today. I worked at the supermarket first thing and when I came out at 8am the roads were just so quiet I wondered what had happened! I didn’t realise they were closing the schools early for half term to avoid the storm.

I picked up B and driving home there were several trees down and even a field shelter had blown up against a hedge. I walked all the dogs and went into work .. forgetting that I work at a school and it would be closed! 🙄🤷🏻‍♀️  It’s a private school and I just think of it as a business.. There was a huge tree down in the car park. 

I’ve been mulling over an idea these past few days.. I used to (many years ago) organise fairs in village halls for maker/sellers of beautiful hand crafted items.. the fairs gradually turned into social events really as all the makers got on so well. It was something that we all enjoyed. I’m thinking of hiring my local village hall for a few hours on a Sunday for some crafty/sewing people to get together. I can supply nibbles and drinks, but I just thought if I advertised it locally for a date in April, people could bring sewing machines and crafty projects, and just have a meet up and sew and craft. So much has been cancelled these past couple of years, and I think other people must be lonely too and just want a good chat with people who have things in common. And I really hate Sundays! It’s my worst day -even though I work in the morning till 8. It’s still a sad day for me. Anyways I think I will look into it. 

So as work was cancelled today I’ve just been indoors with the dogs and cat not doing much -when I actually have so much to do! I promised myself I would list one thing on eBay a day and do one small bit of sewing as well. Failed miserably at those lately!  But I’m hopeful for next week as it’s half term and I’ve got my days free to catch up on everything hopefully. 

A bit about my current life..

  Well, Hello to me. As I sit writing this and starting to chart my life, my two remaining Jack Russells (J and M) are by my sides and my cat - N -is sat at the end of my bed. B, my staffy that was mine and my partners is downstairs as she can’t be in the same room as M as they hate each other. Life is difficult, and so very different from what it was 4months ago it’s unreal. 

I currently have two jobs to try and make ends meet and I’m perpetually busy so that I don’t have time to stop and think too much… I’m menopausal and perpetually tired through lack of sleep. My blood pressure is very high and I make rubbish food choices. On my way to burn out? Maybe… It’s the only way I can cope at the moment though.

I work from 4-8am at the supermarket packing online shopping. I then pick B up from the friend that she stays with over night at 8.15am. I bring her home, walk her and my other two in separate dog walks. Get changed and then go off to work in a school for a few hours doing admin in the office. Then I come home, have food and take B back to my friends for her to stay the night. I get home about 7.30pm and go to bed as I’m up at 2 am for my supermarket job. 

I used to run my partners business. But I can’t now for the life of me take on a good job with responsibility, my mental health is not so good. I have good days and days whereby I’m simply terrified and filled with grief. I could have coped I think with one death, but G being killed in such horrific circumstances just about put paid to my sanity I believe. It’s like I would imagine losing a child. Devastating on top of everything else. 

But.. it’s now three months later and I’m moving forward. I have somewhere to live until I can find somewhere away from here where I don’t see the accident two or three times a day. I have two jobs. I have my beautiful daughter (at uni) I have my health. And I have my other furbabies. So it’s best foot forward with my plans for the the future.